Celebrating Imbolc Early

Today my circle celebrated Imbolc.  I wrote the ritual (with assistance from various books written by people more knowledgeable than me) and we did crafts to celebrate including carving into a self-dedication candle and making binding knots for protection.

Here are two pictures.  The first is in color.  I chose the Orange candle because it represents the following things: Attraction, Encouragement, Stimulation, fire and Courage.  These are what I want to dedicate for my personal path this year.  I also carved these words, a couple of runes and a few of my endeavors for this year into it.

The b&w photo makes it a little easier to see the carving.

I also sent home a crafting kit with each to make Priapic Wands. I love my circle because we always try to make sure that we have crafting to do or some sort of fun participatory event.  We also did a Bardic Circle, each of us sharing a joke or song or quote.  I unleashed my awesome green golf balls joke on them.  It was a blast.

I almost thought none of this would get to happen.  I ended up leaving work 45 minutes late.  I still needed to run to Mystic Treasures to pick up some Amethyst to hand out and go home to cook my contribution to the potluck.  When I got to my apartment, it was surrounded by KCP&L trucks and there was a crew with a shit-ton of cables out of the ground between my building and the next.  I overheard them tell a neighbor they couldn't give an exact time on when they'd be done.  I couldn't cook or print out my ritual or anything.  I felt pretty defeated.  But with the help of my friend Marietta and her husband Aaron..it was all good.  She had an early draft of the ritual I had sent to her that she printed out and he cooked up some mushrooms that I picked up from the store on my way over.  It was a great night and the power was back on when I got home.

Yesterday and today I ate: soy cappuccino, apple, 1/4 Jimmy John's veggie sub, Chipotle Sofritas Burrito, sleeve of graham crackers, bowl of cereal, 1/2 cheese sandwich, carrots and cherry tomatoes, cottage cheese, bag of Twix Bites, mushrooms, wild rice, corn casserole.

Yesterday and today I bought: Amethyst.

This Will Be TMI

I'm a woman who has tried not to buy in to that whole "girls who like sex are just dirty whores or sluts."  I've never hidden the fact that I enjoy sex.  Until I was married and then made to feel like my past was something I should be ashamed of by my husband.  I may have enjoyed myself with various people, but I least I wasn't repeatedly cheating on my spouse!

I used to work at Priscilla's (now Cirilla's) and I had a good time, when I wasn't yelling at our misogynistic boss.  I enjoy a good dirty joke, and there isn't a double entendre I haven't made. 

Apparently I have this effect on those I'm with...they no longer want anything to do with me.  It's gradual.  With my husband, he was just a cheater.  He cheated on his first wife.  He cheated on me (#2) and most likely cheats on the third one.  My current boyfriend and I had a great intimate relationship for about the first two years...then it dwindled.  It was still great, when it happened, but those times got fewer and fewer.  Now, there are months that go by without so much as a peck.

I miss sex.  I miss snuggling up next to someone exhausted, sweaty and spent.  I miss waking up and doing it all over again.

Yesterday and today I ate: vegan garlic cheese bread, 1/2 a vegan pizza, 2 sleeves of graham crackers, a cheesestick, 2 glazed chocolate donuts, a soy latte, 2-23oz Boulevard Wheats, cherry tomatoes, carrots, cheese sandwich, apple, cottage cheese, Chipotle veggie burrito.

Yesterday and today I bought: a cardigan, a tee-shirt, 3 books, a stuffed stick pirate and a case for my tablet.